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Top 10 Ways I Am A “Bad” Mother

Let’s face it, no one is perfect at anything, especially parenting.  In my opinion it is not about right and wrong, just finding our own ways to get to the same destination. As a full-time working mom of three under three (including twins) things don’t always go according to plan.

So here are the things that make me a bad mother. Feel free to add your own in the comments section, it feels good to confess.

I let the twins play in the curtains because it was cute.

I let the twins play in the curtains because it was cute.

10. I have to hold in the laughter when I hear my kids swearing.  Personally, I don’t care that much about minor swear words, in fact, I actually find it cute when my son says “what the hell?” in his little three year old voice.  But I know, I know, it’s not funny to swear, tee hee hee. 

9. I have bribed my children.  I have probably spend hundreds of dollars buying chocolate milk for my son because he knows that if he is good during the outing he will get a chocolate milk.  Really, it’s a small price to pay for a stress free shopping trip.

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Hey, it’s a cartoon right?

8. I sometimes let them watch movies that are not entirely appropriate because I want to watch them and/or I can’t handle watching Shrek one more time.  Yes, my son has watched Iron Man and the Simpsons and he is three.

7. I don’t cook.  Yes, I almost never cook.  Unless microwaving counts as cooking, which changes everything.  In that case, I rarely cook!  I don’t make my own baby food either (although I do buy organic).

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My daughter playing with a dog toy on her head.

6. In my house dog toys are baby toys and baby toys are dog toys.  Hey, it’s all about sharing in our house.  Why else would Fisher Price make a line of dog toys?

5. I play sneaky games. Sometimes, at night, when I am tired and hear one of the babies crying, instead of jumping up I play the waiting game with my husband to see who will crack and get out of bed first. It works when the dogs scratch to go outside too.

4. I didn’t have a bedtime routine.  Since I put the kid to bed myself, I gave up fighting to get my son to bed, so for months I just let him fall asleep on the sofa and then we carried him to bed once he was asleep. Who cares where they sleep as long as they are finally asleep right?

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All the money I have spent on “his” Thomas collection.

3. Sometimes encourage the kids to buy toys that I like.  When my son started liking Thomas the Tank Engine I was all for it because I loved setting up and playing with the trains too.  I was always on the lookout for one I…um I mean he… didn’t have.  All aboard!

2. I blog.  There are times when I should have been playing with the kids, but instead of giving them my full attention I was on my phone blogging (or checking emails etc.).  I used to do it while nursing or they napped but now they are weaned and they only take one nap a day so…

1. Bath time is more like a weekly event (unless playing in the dogs’ water dish counts)

Sometimes we use the babies as props for funny pictures...Jabba Juney

Sometimes we use the babies as props for funny pictures…Jabba Juney

Let’s face it, bath time with babies can be dangerous and trying to bathe twins by yourself while keeping an eye on big brother is just a recipe for disaster.  Plus, I was bathing the twins a lot more in the early days, and their skin would get very dried out.  Nope, twice a week is good enough for us. With three little ones I will never have that “perfect” bedtime routine where everyone has a calming bath and a bedtime story. More like chaos until everyone is in bed and I collapse on the couch (lucky if I get a bath myself).

Playing the Game of Diapers isn’t about getting stuck on the small stuff, it’s about loving your kids, doing your best, and enjoying every moment of every day.

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About Shannon C

I am a university educated full-time working mother of three children. Proudly Canadian, I freeze my butt off along with my loving partner, two dogs and a cat. I hope you enjoy reading my posts as much as I love writing them, but if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Discussion

153 thoughts on “Top 10 Ways I Am A “Bad” Mother

  1. I let my son watch Futurama the other day (just bo

    Posted by Noel Marie Ross | January 29, 2014, 3:04 pm
  2. I let my son watch Futurama the other day (just blogged about that awesome decision), forgot to pack my toddler shoes on a vacation, and that baby bath thing is spot on!! Great read. :)

    Posted by Noel Marie Ross | January 29, 2014, 3:06 pm
  3. My friend and I used to award ourselves the “Bad Mother of the Week” honor. Once I kept my daughter home from school on Veteran’s Day, thinking it was a school holiday. I find out differently until she came home and said, “Mom, everyone else went to school yesterday.” Oh, well, we visited my dad who was in the Veteran’s Home, so it was a better use of the day anyway. Only she’s nineteen now, and will never let me live it down.

    Posted by kymlucas | January 29, 2014, 5:56 pm
  4. hah!! loved it…i am not a mother but i have to babysit my niece and nephew a lot….i admit, i let them watch tv…something their mother would kill me for…but it is so much of a relief that am willing to take the risk as against sticking my neck out and checking on them every second.
    thank you for your honesty!!! loved it!!!!
    congratulations and good luck!! :)

    Posted by moodsnmoments | January 30, 2014, 10:21 am
  5. hhhh, I could copy paste your post to make myself the “bad father”… funny post

    Posted by Martin's transportation | January 30, 2014, 7:38 pm
  6. Thanks for the laughs! I’m also a “bad mother”.
    Sometimes when our twin daughters were toddlers and they wouldn’t sleep in the middle of the night, I would put them in the pack and play, stick in a Barney tape and pass out on the couch while they watched! I know I was supposed to help them learn to be better sleepers and this was breaking some rule. I don’t care..sleep deprivation is not your friend!
    The good news is, they’re now 18 and seem to have survived my “bad parenting”

    Posted by kimi76 | January 31, 2014, 12:20 pm
  7. I decided not to take my son to the doctor after he fell off his bike jumping curbs on the street. He went to Sixth grade camp the next morning for a week. When he came home, I looked at his arm and noticed it was still swollen. The doctor took one look at it and said “Oh, yeah it’s broken. I’ll have to do x-rays to confirm it, but it’s pretty obvious.” OOPS!

    Posted by Ann | February 1, 2014, 12:08 am
  8. In my observation kids of ‘bad’ parents seen to do better than those parents who follow ‘the books’.
    When my first born was 18 months (he is 30 now) I went to the doctor worried because he would only eat sausages and vegemite sandwiches. The doctor said “do you have a problem cooking sausages”. Or in other words don’t sweat it.
    another time he said ” why do you worry so much, it is always the mothers fault anyway. if they turn out to be great it will be despite of you, if they end up in prison it will be because of you. So do whatever works for you”
    They turned out great despite of my ‘bad parenting.

    Posted by muchlygirl | February 1, 2014, 10:32 pm
  9. Too funny! I have done all of the above and my kids aren’t too emotionally scarred! My kids are older now, and a lot of those things just haven’t changed.

    Posted by simplylettingitout | February 2, 2014, 3:49 pm
  10. I potty trained my daughter using the iPad and now she sits on the toilet with it forever…and I let her sometimes so I can nurse her sister or just do nothing, lol. Loved this!

    Posted by spicypepita | February 3, 2014, 8:08 pm
  11. I´m sure you are an awesome mother.

    Posted by Ryan | February 4, 2014, 8:36 am
  12. I am definitely a “bad” mother. I’ve been bribing my oldest for 15 years – I wouldn’t have been able to shower otherwise. And I usually bribe my kids by letting them watch inappropriate television.

    Posted by I suck as a parent | February 4, 2014, 11:51 am
  13. Motherhood is a tough gig so the success comes when we know the kids are fed, safe, and go to bed with the feeling of being loved. Keep rockin at motherhood!

    Posted by fantasha | February 4, 2014, 10:45 pm
  14. My husband and daughter bond over the Simpsons. She’s four. I am sooo not above bribing the 18 mth old (he has recently drifted in to the dark side and lost his damn mind) and the four yr old swears like a boss. I’m over it. I blog so …ya know. Sometimes you just have to look the other way, even if your daughter is singing the “bad” words in the song on the radio and your son is following (and eating) the trail of dog food left on the floor.

    You don’t sound like a bad Mom to me! You sound like the kind of Mom I want to have coffee and playtime with (= Great post.

    Posted by T. Dawn | February 4, 2014, 10:53 pm
    • Thanks! Yeah, sounds like we would definitely hit it off :-) People get so hard on themselves for not being “perfect” parents, but in the scheme of things, half this stuff is really no big deal. Thanks for reading.

      Posted by Shannon | February 5, 2014, 8:17 am
  15. LOVE this! Sounds just like my house.

    My youngest son quotes Sherlock. It’s almost worth it to get the judgemental looks from (what I can only assume are absolutely perfect) parents at school. Not even slightly bothered!

    Our kids are happy, healthy and awesome, if that makes us ‘bad’ parents, then I don’t want to be good… xx

    Posted by nicolaleonie | February 6, 2014, 8:15 am
  16. I only have 1 but, this sounds a lot like my parenting. I do cook diner and once a week breakfast for hubby. I’m terrible with keeping the house clean, though. Lol

    Posted by hollyhuskey | February 7, 2014, 12:33 pm
  17. Oh so true, though I might not be doing the same things, I am guilty of much more craziness when it comes to parenting. In my defense, oh, I don’t have a defense. I am a mother but a woman too.

    Posted by mammaspeaks | February 8, 2014, 7:20 am
  18. I don’t like the game of boasting about being a bad parent. We are entirely responsible for our children’s hearts and minds and I for one don’t take that responsibility lightly. It is not just their physical body that we are responsible for, they need us to guide them in their behaviour and choices.
    I don’t care how badly you behave, but to boast about it is perverse and immature.
    You can add that as number 11 and have a good laugh at my/your children’s expense.

    Posted by Charmania | February 8, 2014, 5:57 pm
    • You are entitled to your opinion. It must be nice to be perfect. Cheers.

      Posted by Shannon | February 8, 2014, 9:24 pm
    • Oops apparently not perfect enough to see that this is a satire designed to help all the mothers out there who feel guilty because they can only do their best and that isn’t good enough for judgemental people like you who don’t know anything about their lives at all. It’s sad that you have to put others down to make yourself feel good, but I chose to pick others up instead. Maybe that’s a lesson you might want to try teaching to your children before they go around misjudging people too.

      Posted by Shannon | February 8, 2014, 9:30 pm
    • I do not consider this post to be boasting about being a bad mother. For you to say that is absolutely ridiculous! Its designed to be funny, to let other moms know they aren’t alone in not being the “perfect” mother. Its entertaining, lighthearted and I for one can relate to every single reason I may be a “bad” mother. But even as I relate to them, I know I’m not a bad mother. I’m a wonderful mother, at least my kids think I am. Each day is new, each day is a lesson and we are all just trying to do our best. I find your comment to be highly judgmental and I do believe you should start searching for and reading “how to develop a sense of humor” blogs.

      Posted by Mommy Needs A drink | February 10, 2014, 8:29 pm
      • Thank you so much for your comment. I am glad you understood the true meaning of the post. None of us are bad mothers but there is no shortage of people that will make you feel that way…especially on the internet! Thanks so much for your comment.

        Posted by Shannon | February 10, 2014, 9:50 pm
  19. Reblogged this on MS Mommy Blog and commented:
    I Love this blog and this woman.

    Posted by Hempchick | February 10, 2014, 8:44 am
  20. Reblogged this on Mommy Needs Another Drink and commented:
    None of it really makes any of us a “bad” mother, it just helps us realize, we aren’t the only ones. I found this post to be funny and lighthearted. I hope you enjoy and get a few laughs and maybe one or two “I’ve SO done that!” moments.

    Posted by Mommy Needs A drink | February 11, 2014, 3:48 pm
  21. You sound like a “normal” mom to me.

    Posted by nonnie57 | February 15, 2014, 11:54 am
  22. Love it! You have great survival instincts wish I could be better at #5 on the weekends. I do #3 a ton. I get bored with the same toy.

    Posted by fromheretotherewithkids.com | February 20, 2014, 5:21 am
  23. Reblogged this on travelintator's Blog and commented:
    Words can’t even begin to explain how much I love this! You are amazing! Much love!

    Posted by travelintator | February 26, 2014, 4:53 am
  24. Words can’t explain how much I love this! You are amazing! Much love!

    Posted by travelintator | February 26, 2014, 4:55 am
  25. Loool my son 4 years old and he still sleep with me because me and my husband couldn’t sleep without him :D

    Posted by noran1987 | March 19, 2014, 8:41 pm
  26. Motherhood need patient and we sometimes need our space but when u didn’t have this space u do anything with them to calm down urself so u r agood mother :)

    Posted by noran1987 | March 19, 2014, 9:13 pm

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