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Infertility, Mommy Musings: Thoughts and Opinions

Mother dies after giving birth to quads

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Erica Morales

Lately I feel like the news is full of multiple births.  Obviously, these things catch my eye being a mom of twins more than maybe your average person. Also, I recently read the Gosselin’s book (those poor kids). 
If you follow A Game of Diapers on Facebook you will know that I am a fan of the Gardiner quad squad and have been sharing information about them and frequenting their site. In their case, she has endometriosis and they tried for 8 years before going to ivf. When the did ivf they only implanted two eggs but by some fluke/miracle they both divided and she was pregnant with two sets of identical twins girls. At this point the babies are almost a month old and doing well.
It was yesterday when one of their posts popped up about another quad mama. This one was younger than me and had given birth to pretty much term quads. The catch, she died right after giving birth.  A “poster child for quad pregnancy” as her doctor called her was now gone and she has left her husband and four newborns. I couldn’t find much info other than they did ivf. They say she may have died due to blood pressure/stroke. I have to wonder how many eggs were implanted or what her story was.
I guess my point is that this story is a stark reminder that humans were not designed to carry higher order multiples. Success stories like Jonathan and Kate (and by successful I mean the pregnancy) or the Gardiners are so sensationalized that people think with modern medicine they can do anything.
Well you know what?  That’s because they don’t make tv shows about women who lost one, two or all their babies due to carrying too many. And honestly I wouldn’t have even heard about this story if it wasn’t for FB since it’s from the US.
Obviously I am not judging or advocating fetal reduction, and in fact, I am a huge supporter of ART (fertility treatments). But looking at that picture of a happy pregnant woman and knowing she is now dead still haunts me. I know from experience that two is tough. While I would definitely take them if they were left on my doorstep I am not sure if I could handle the risks associated with a quad pregnancy.
What do you think? Are we desensitized to this type of stuff? Where do people draw the line between trying to get pregnant and having a litter?

If you want to learn more here are a few links:
The Gardiner Quad Squad
Mother dies after having quadruplets

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About Shannon

I am a university educated full-time working mother of four children. Proudly Canadian, I freeze my butt off along with my loving partner, two dogs and a cat. I hope you enjoy reading my posts as much as I love writing them, but if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Discussion

13 thoughts on “Mother dies after giving birth to quads

  1. I agree, this story is sad. I was an IVF patient as well. I transferred two with each pregnancy. The REs that i used would not allow a transfer of more than two. Ever. Kate Gosselin did an IUI. So did OctoMom. IUIs are actually more likely to result in multiple births than IVF is because it’s harder to determine the amount of eggs. I personally could never do reduction. Going in, we knew our chances or multiples. We also knew our chances of loss (which was two for us). We ended up with one viable & live birth baby. I’d do it all again!

    Posted by Marcia | January 18, 2015, 5:05 pm
    • I agree that iuis are more likely to result in multiple births as in Kates case. The problem is that it’s so much cheaper than ivf. Here in Canada provinces are starting to look at funding ivf just to cut down on the amount of higher order multiples. There are so many sad stories out there including my own that people don’t know about or consider before they are won over by the novelty of quads. Thanks so much for stopping by and congrats on your baby.

      Posted by Shannon | January 18, 2015, 8:30 pm
  2. Although I only have given birth to one baby, my daughter, this still haunts me. Carrying one alone was extremely hard for me, so I can only imagine the kind of pain that this poor woman was in. What saddens me most is thinking about her poor husband being left with four babies to learn to father and take care of all by himself. He lost his wife, and gained four miracles. But that still doesn’t take away the immense heartache he must be feeling right now. I hope he has a wonderful support system, because taking care of one newborn by yourself and/or with your your partner is hard enough. It makes me so sad to think that he could be drowning in his own sorrows, while trying to be a daddy as well. Those poor babies are always going to live with the fact that their mom died after giving birth to them. Even though they shouldn’t, they may carry that guilt around for the rest of their lives. I hope that this story turns out to be a happy ending, despite all of the pain.

    Posted by TimeDancer | January 18, 2015, 8:17 pm
  3. I have never had to deal with IVF but I’ve had my share of fertility issues. I’ve been very lucky to have had three children even though the last two were very high risk because of my blood pressure. My last pregnancy was extremely hard on my body especially my heart yet I would do it all over again because my kids were worth it. For women who have had to go through extremes to conceive the reward out weighs the risk. I just pray that the father is okay and that he will have all the support that he will need to bring those babies up without their mom.

    Posted by prudencevwhittaker | January 18, 2015, 8:41 pm
    • It took us 8 months of treatments to concieve and then i lost a baby at 10 weeks probably due to the fact that it was a triplet pregnancy so this story definitely hits close to my heart. I will pray with you.

      Posted by Shannon | January 18, 2015, 9:02 pm
  4. It is not for me to decide what is right for anyone else. 2 years of infertility and 2 losses for me. We were faced with the decision at 6 months how to proceed. It was then we decided no infertilty treatments for us. We were narrowing down adoption agencies to go with when I found out we were pregnant with my oldest. And 3 years later, TWINS. Spontaneous. Shocking. Super scary.

    Posted by Princess Mommy | January 18, 2015, 10:26 pm
    • I apologize if it came across that way, i was not trying to tell other people what to do. My concern was more that people are not fully aware of the risks and tradgedies that come with multiple pregnancies (and i know first hand). Thanks for reading.

      Posted by Shannon | January 19, 2015, 7:43 am
      • Oh no, I wasn’t saying you came off that way. I think it was really well written. I know you had IVF and I know plenty of people who have done the same or had IUI. I was trying to tread lightly because I don’t agree with infertility treatments at all but don’t want to say that it’s wrong for someone else, know what I mean?

        Posted by Princess Mommy | January 19, 2015, 7:51 am
      • Actually i never had ivf. I didnt realize you were against it, there is definitely nithing wrong with that. Everyone has to decide for themselves what works for them. Cheers!

        Posted by Shannon | January 19, 2015, 8:00 am
      • Oh I thought you did. I often get many of my twin mom friends confused. I’m so sorry for the mistake.

        Posted by Princess Mommy | January 19, 2015, 9:51 pm
      • No worries!

        Posted by Shannon | January 19, 2015, 9:59 pm
  5. trop bizarre la fille elle a combien de bébés dans son ventre

    Posted by evaplanchot | January 21, 2015, 3:15 am

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