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Mommy Musings: Thoughts and Opinions, What Do You Think?

Being an Older Mom

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Recently, Janet Jackson announced that she is pregnant at 49. Good for her, I think that’s great but it got me thinking,   “until what age would I have kids?”

I had my first child at 30 and I am now pregnant with #4 at 36 and let me tell you, there is a huge difference. I may not be that much older but I am so much more exhausted and it seems like all my symptoms are more exaggerated this time. I used to be a gym rat and I can barely work out now. So would I actually have the stamina to have a baby at 49?

My mom had me at 30 and I always felt like she was so old but now older mothers are common place (but even I rolled my eyes reading about the 72 year old woman in India giving birth). Women are waiting longer to have families and that’s a fact. I guess a lot of it also comes down to fertility. In Janet’s  case I am sure she had some help but for most people they probably call it quits when menopause comes knocking.

Would I love to have more kids? Yes.
Are there a million reasons not to? Yes.
But, those aside I have to say that based on the age argument I’d say I’d be tapped out by 40.

I give older moms a tremendous amount of respect because this parenting thing is hard and there is a big difference between 20 and 40.

What do you think? How old were you when you had your first? How old for your last? Any insights are always welcome.

Thanks for reading!

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About Shannon

I am a university educated full-time working mother of three children and expecting #4. Proudly Canadian, I freeze my butt off along with my loving partner, two dogs and a cat. I hope you enjoy reading my posts as much as I love writing them, but if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Discussion

17 thoughts on “Being an Older Mom

  1. I was 23 with my first and 26 with my second and I’m done. My mom had me at 34 (her last) and my brother at 18 (her first) with two in between us. And the four of us often discuss the different phases of my mom as a mother by the age. She was definitely more lenient with me.

    But I can’t imagine having kids at that age. Honestly I’m very young and I have days where I can’t keep up with my two. I’m very glad I had them young.

    Posted by Sherilyn Nicole | May 17, 2016, 10:11 am
  2. I was 29 when I had my twins. We aren’t planning on anymore and honestly I don’t know how we’d do it! I know we’re jaded because we had twins first, but damn if I’m not exhausted beyond belief everyday.

    Posted by MamaEm | May 17, 2016, 11:02 am
  3. My mom had her last at 46, her first a few days shy of 20. I know it was a lot harder on her the older she got. DH wants to be done by 30. I’m 27 now. I think I would be fine until at least 35 but I don’t know… maybe when I’m 35 I will be saying I’ll be fine having more until 40 and so on….

    Posted by journeyformybaby | May 17, 2016, 5:40 pm
    • Good point I guess you don’t know until you know. I had no idea thought what a difference it would be in just 6 years but again it’s not just the pregnancy it’s the more kids to take care of. Having my first at this age would probably not be so bad since I’d be able to rest lol. Have a great day.

      Posted by Shannon | May 17, 2016, 5:45 pm
      • Haha! For sure! My pregnancies were only 9.5 months apart and the second one was definitely more exhausting than the first when I could just rest when I needed to. 😉

        Posted by journeyformybaby | May 17, 2016, 6:39 pm
      • You are so so lucky to get pregnant that easily. I am jealous!

        Posted by Shannon | May 17, 2016, 7:54 pm
      • I was very very fortunate the second time around! After trying for 4.5 years and iuis and ivfs to get pregnant with my first, it was a complete shock to get pregnant “natural” with my second! They are both miracles in their own ways. I’m so thankful every single day!!!

        Posted by journeyformybaby | May 17, 2016, 9:23 pm
      • Not us we had to do treatments for all of them 😦

        Posted by Shannon | May 17, 2016, 9:32 pm
      • I’m sorry. I fully expected we would too. I know these types of things don’t happen to every infertile couple, regardless of all the people who say “I bet now that you got pregnant once, you will have no problems in the future.” Sadly, that just isn’t true the majority of the time. 😦

        Posted by journeyformybaby | May 17, 2016, 9:37 pm
      • Thanks so much for your understanding, you are so right and I really appreciate you saying it. 😊

        Posted by Shannon | May 17, 2016, 9:54 pm
      • Based on a true story 😉 thanks for reading

        Posted by Shannon | May 18, 2016, 4:31 pm
  4. I was 30 when the twins were born. My husband wants more, but by the time I feel like I’d be comfortable with it (when the twins are in kindergarten) I’d also be knocking on 35-36 and starting treatments again. I just don’t know that I want to be 36 and pregnant again.

    Posted by Theresa | May 19, 2016, 10:25 am
    • Lol that’s me! We did start treatments when I was 33 and it took over two years including over 6 iuis and ivf and it was hell with the little ones dragging them to appointments and stuff but finally we got lucky. I guess having a bigger gap than I wanted is good in that sense that they are more independent etc but I had never planned on being pregnant this old my goal was always to be done by 35. Whatever you decide good luck, I am sure you will just know. Thanks for reading 😊

      Posted by Shannon | May 19, 2016, 11:44 am
  5. I was 20 with my first, 22 with my 2nd, 24 with my 3rd, and I’m 25 now pregnant with my 4th.

    There a pros and cons. Even though I get exhausted, I have WAY more energy now than I liked will in 10 years and we wanted a large family so staring young was right for us.

    However, we aren’t rolling in it, so starting later would’ve meant more financial security. On that same thought, we are pretty wise with our money and should be able to retire young and all our kids will be adults!! So that’s a big bonus.

    My mother in law had her 2nd (and last) child 17 years after she had her first (my husband). HUGE DIFFERENCE. She’s completely exhausted, but a lot more patient and relaxed.

    Long response. Sorry! I have a lot of thoughts on the subject. Lol. Obviously, it depends on the person/couple/situation.

    Good read!

    Posted by thegreatlifeofwife | May 19, 2016, 8:58 pm
    • Wow you are so lucky to be so fertile 🙂 I agree that big family’s are good but I was still in school at your age so that just wasn’t in the cards for me. I often wonder what it would have been like to have them younger so thanks for sharing 😊

      Posted by Shannon | May 19, 2016, 9:18 pm

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